Wednesday, June 3, 2020

Questions

Seeing something next to Elizabeth's bed, I asked, "Elizabeth, why are there dirty clothes on the floor?"

Elizabeth glanced away from her book to see what was on the floor and then responded, "That's a really good question, dad!"

"Elizabeth, that was my way of asking you to go pick it up."  

"Dad, that would have been much more clear if you had just said that instead of asking it as a question."  

I can't wait until she's a teenager.  

Monday, May 18, 2020

How to Make Everyone Think You're a Millionaire

I have a cup that I dump my pocket full of change in when I get home.  I've been using the same cup for many years, but since I so rarely use cash, the cup is not as big as you may expect.

Due to coronavirus boredom, Elizabeth begged to count the change in the cup.  I quickly agreed.

When Elizabeth finished, she brought the cup back to me and said, "Pro tip, dad.  Keep the pennies at the bottom so people only see the quarters, nickels and dimes. People will think you're a millionaire!!!"

Thursday, April 30, 2020

Playing Games with Lizzie

Starting around last Thanksgiving, we started playing a lot of games as a family.  Mostly various card games.

Playing with Elizabeth can be a challenge because it feels like she's all over the place.  She's hyper.  It seems like she doesn't pay attention.  She can be loud.  She wants to play with the dog and do other things in the middle of the game.  I'm constantly barking at her to pay attention.

Yet, somehow, she seems to win more often than she doesn't.

I've always attributed this to the luck of card games.  Until tonight.  

As she won the last game, she made a comment - something along the lines of, "Hey, pro tip, it really helps if you memorize what other people play" (her comment was a bit more nuanced based on the way the game is played).

Elizabeth then rattled off what she had memorized about our hands during the course of the game.

Huh...I guess Elizabeth's consistent winning isn't just the luck of the draw, and she's paying way, way, way more attention than we thought.


Thank You

Elizabeth's favorite candy are the chocolate malt balls called Whoppers.  She loves the things.  Passionately.  But she doesn't get them very often.

A gave her a couple of those little chocolate malt balls, which she quickly devoured.

She turned to me, showing me that she finished her treat.  I knew she was about to start pleading and negotiating for more.

"Elizabeth," I said.  "I was nice enough to let you have some candy.  You're not going to complain that it wasn't enough and ask for more, are you?"

Without missing a beat, Elizabeth responded, "Of course not.  That would be ridiculous."

"Oh, then what where you about to say?"

"I just wanted to say thank you for everything you do!!!"

Tuesday, April 28, 2020

I'm Thankful For...Coffee in the Mornings

It's nice waking up and having a nice, hot cup of coffee.

Katie has watched us make coffee for a while now with keen interest.  This is a ten year old who loves coffee.  Loves it.  For several years, she's had a love for coffee, and, occasionally, we will let her have a sip.

Right before the start of the coronavirus self-isolation, Katie proudly showed us that she's been paying attending to how we make our coffee (which certainly isn't rocket science since we have a Keurig).  She takes mixing in one Splenda with a little bit of cream very seriously.

For nearly two months, Katie brings us a cup of coffee in bed each and every morning.  She's never been asked to do this.

Katie is not a morning person, but she loves getting up before us to get our coffee made.  When she started this new chore, she would deliver our coffee to us as 6:30 a.m.  That's just a little earlier than we'd really like to enjoy our coffee.

Now she's moved this to about 7:00-7:15 a.m. every morning, which is perfect.

I'm thankful for a daughter who brings us coffee each and every morning without being asked.

Saturday, April 18, 2020

Stuff Sheltering in Place in Manhattan is Causing Me to Do

In the last few weeks, I've started doing something I never expected I'd do: laundry in the bathtub.

Living in a Manhattan, we don't have a washer or dryer in our apartment.  

We have a laundry room in the building, but we have practically a thousand people who live in the building.  And statistically, we likely have more people who have COVID-19 living in this building than there are people who have it in most towns in America.  

So, while Wife does occasionally brave the laundry room for some laundry that we really can't do in the bathtub, we try to minimize those trips by washing most items in the bathtub.

Yeah, the kids are going to remember this period in our lives forever.  And so will the parents.    

Friday, April 17, 2020

Get Out of Bed and Put on a Shirt

A Florida judge has a message for attorneys participating in court hearings by video conference: get out of bed and put on a shirt. 

From Judge Dennis Bailey's letter: "One comment that needs sharing and that is the judges would appreciate it if the lawyers and their clients keep in mind these Zoom hearings are just that: hearings. They are not casual phone conversations. It is remarkable how many ATTORNEYS appear inappropriately on camera. We've seen many lawyers in casual shirts and blouses, with no concern for ill-grooming, in bedrooms with the master bed in the background, etc. One male lawyer appeared shirtless and one female attorney appeared still in bed, still under the covers. And putting on a beach cover-up won't cover up you're poolside in a bathing suit. So, please, if you don't mind, let's treat court hearings as court hearings, whether Zooming or not."

Thursday, April 16, 2020

What Can We See from Our Apartment?

Wife and I were talking last week, and she commented that would be great to have some binoculars so we could see what’s around us while we’re locked in our apartment.

We could see the Hudson River, some of the ships (like the Navy’s Comfort), the Statue of Liberty, One World Trade Center, Hudson Yards and over to New Jersey. 

So I ordered a pair of binoculars. 

As soon as the binoculars arrived, and I open them up and looked out the window. 

I was shocked that the first thing I saw was a woman with binoculars in the apartment building across from us staring back at me. 

I feel rather violated, but I am staring at her with binoculars.

True story.

Wednesday, April 15, 2020

Stuff the Coronavirus is Causing Me to Do

During this period of social distancing and house arrest, I've started doing something I never thought I'd do.  I bought hair clippers, and I'm cutting my own hair.  We've been doing this isolation thing long enough that today I gave myself my 3rd haircut.  I'm not ready to quit my day job, but I've paid for worse haircuts than I give myself.

Sunday, April 12, 2020

Coronavirus in Manhattan Causes a Different Kind of Easter Celebration

Well, the last six weeks or so have been...ummm...interesting.  For posterity's sake, we realized we need to update the blog with how the COVID-19 pandemic is impacting our family in Midtown Manhattan.

We've been hiding out right in the middle of what has become the epicenter of this epidemic.  It's not unusual to look out the window and see first-responders there to take the sick to the hospital. But sometimes it looks like the victims of the pandemic are headed to straight to the the morgue.

Sure, maybe our fears and actions are overblown.  After all, we're young.  Reasonably.  We're healthy.   Reasonably.  The vast majority of the victims recover just fine.  But not all.

Will we ever get the pictures of the mass graves from right around us in Hart Island out of our mind?

Will the knowledge that parents around us are dying in isolation, family members barred from saying goodbye be seared into our psyche.

How can life go back to how it was after Wife spends an evening texting with a friend who is deathly ill from the virus herself, but using all of her strength to try to figure out how to dispose of her mother's corpse before the City carries through with the threat to bury her mother in a potter's field.

Most of America is going through the same thing we are - social distancing and staying home.  What makes our experience a bit unique is that our family of four is hiding out in an apartment that is smaller than most American's bedroom.  Of course, our dog has no idea what's going on, but having his humans with him constantly has him happier than he's ever been.  He hopes this continues indefinitely.

When this pandemic is behind us, the world will be looking back on these events to analyze armchair quarterback what occurred.  I suspect this will continue for months, years, decades and even centuries.

My whole life, I've heard how those who lived through the Great Depression had certain idiosyncrasies due to what they went through.  For better or worse, we'll probably have the same thing.  Will we ever shake hands again?  Will holding the handrail on a crowded subway ever seem safe?  Will Monk's fear of germs ever seem funny again?  Will American's walk around the street looking like bank robbers become a permanent aspect of society?  Even in the best case scenarios, I suspect there will be a piece of us that never goes completely back to our previous mindset.

There likely never be a time in our lives again, when we go months with only spending a few occasional moments more than 25 feet from our immediate family.  I suspect that in a few decades, when I'm an old man and my girls are grown, this period of closeness may be some of the fondest memories of my life.

Or maybe this will be remembered as the lull before America's, or even the world's, economic collapse.  Maybe the biggest takeaway from this will be he federal, state and local government's ability to make monumental demands of its citizens and businesses.  Maybe there will be many of us who never go back to the type of human interactions we experienced a few weeks ago.  But right now we just need survive - and to try to do our part so the more vulnerable around us survive.

For the last five weeks, church has been cancelled.  The building is closed.  There are no in person meetings.  Of course, our church - most churches - has tried to minister and provide the ability to worship online, but watching an online video stream isn't the same as the church gathering together.  But it's the best we can do given the circumstances.  Organizing church programming has certainly kept Wife busy.

When church was initially closed, today was the day that everybody targeted for opening back up.  We thought we'd take a month to let the virus pass and then start meeting together for Easter.

Nope.

Today we celebrated the Resurrection in our apartment.  We watched a few church services online, but never left our apartment.  Wife worked hard to make us all Easter baskets, so in that respect, it was normal.  We even colored eggs.  So many elements of today make it just like a normal Easter Sunday.  But it wasn't.