Returning to the subject our new NYC housing, the funniest part of the process came yesterday when Wife was speaking with the leasing manager about arranging a time for the “closing.” The agent said to her, "Oh yeah, your husband is a lawyer. I'd better send you the lease now so everything will go smoothly at the closing." Apparently, he’s familiar with my kind.
After spending some time reviewing the contract, I decided that the 38-page monstrosity is surprisingly fair. Unfortunately, we were required to waive our right to a jury trial if a dispute arises. This is unfortunate because I have an ace up my sleeve to ensure victory in a jury trial. If I had a personal matter that had to be tried before a jury, the first thing I would do is get LindaJ up here so that she could work her magic in front of a jury.
Wednesday, July 9, 2008
New Housing Addendum
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3 comments:
You're so sweet, and I love you guys, but I'm not taking the NY bar so I can represent you in a landlord/tenant matter. I'm not even really preparing for the Texas bar for the sake of MYSELF.
I would, however, take the NY bar to represent you in the event of grievous bodily injury at the hands of a deep-pocket corporation. Like, say, you got hit by a Wal-Mart truck that runs a red light while you were properly crossing at the crosswalk, and you lost both arms and a leg as a result. Even then, I might need the victim to have suffered traumatic brain injury, and the other one of you standing on the sidewalk witnessing the entire accident and getting covered in your loved one's blood...which is then broadcast on the six o'clock news. Some juicy personal injury right there.
So call me if that happens, ok?
Well, you just need to be practicing five years, then you can get reciprocity without taking the Bar.
Don't count on ever hearing about us properly crossing at the crosswalk - New Yorkers just don't do that. As I was crossing the street last week, it dawned on me that by not waiting for the walk signal, I am facing negligence per se and comparative negligence defenses when a taxi finally hits me.
Also, don't count on a Wal-Mart truck. New Yorker's don't do that either. Would getting hit by a beat-up 1983 delivery truck for a mom and pop deli be sufficient to bring you out here? What about a cyclist? Those scare me the most.
Based upon reading your dream personal injury case, it sounds like you've been studying torts too long. You've carefully crafted the perfect plaintiff's case (for the non-legal geeks, the key is that there will not be immediate death for the victim and also bystander recovery for the spouse). Also, New York doesn't those punitive damage caps you are used to, so there is the potential for higher recoveries.
Of course, any lawyer could win with that case. I want to watch you get the jury in tears when you describe the traumatic experience of our sink getting clogged.
Give me an exploding lighter case. I remember how your eyes teared up at my description of the victim choking to death on the ashes of her own burned flesh. Ah...good times...
As for the taxi, I've always wondered if maybe an assumption of the risk argument wouldn't work AGAINST a NY cab driver. Follow me here: everyone knows that NO ONE crosses at the crosswalk in NYC. Ergo, by choosing to obtain a hack license and operate on the streets of NYC, the cabbie has assumed the risk of being the named defendant in an auto v. pedestrian. Has the potential to push back against claims of comparative negligence, and up the ante for our poor jaywalking victim. That, or I'm just not getting enough sleep. I claimed ownership in fee simple absolute over some hummus last night. Yes, I knew it was my husband's, but I openly and notoriously had possession of the hummus for a full 15 minutes.
I hate the bar exam.
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